The time of so many things.

Current mood: peaceful

And by 'so many things' I mean, this is the time of year given all kinds of extra meaning in so many areas of life. Family intensity(for good or bad), capitalistic consumerism, spiritual celebration, and that is hardly scratching the surface.

I might even call it a dangerous time. There is so much our there in life, somewhat amplified at this time of year, that can so easily distract us from what we as living, human beings are seeking that it is quite easy to lose sight of our path to those sought-after things. Life gets really noisy at this time of year and I would like to offer something on the quieter side for your perusal.

Sometimes - I am not sure how often without going back to look - I write blogs here merely for myself in a somewhat selfish need to express for whatever reason prods me at the time. There are other times - probably a more common occurence - that I write blogs here to hopefully build those of my friends here who might read what it is that I write. This also typically holds a somewhat selfish need as I am often repayed in kind by your own words of reflection and inspiration which I do highly value. Today I write for a somewhat different reason.

I am not very into buying people gifts at Christmas time for several reasons. The obvious reason, me being a poor sack, is a large influencing factor here. But a larger contributing idea is that I have lost, somewhere along the way of life, the value of physical worldly things to a large degree. The things of the world that I most enjoy are usually tools (a musical instrument, a camera, a fine-tip mechanical pencil) or things which have value in shaping ones character(an inspirational book, beautiful music, a hug.) These things are either tricky to buy within the time frame of the holiday or difficult to discern in the first place. I will gladly give any of these gifts as I can when I can. Sorry if I can't fit them in when everybody else in the world does.

Regardless... I have recently felt inspired that I should give you all the gift of my personal feelings. This is a place in the time of my life which I hold high value for, and I think that sharing my personal thoughts on it would be closest to the best gift I can even give anyway... and it was only paid for by my personal experience.

I have composed my thoughts into a letter as follows:

Loved Ones,

I am your son, your brother, your uncle, your friend. I come to you at this time in the form of my word, my expression, my love for you. I hope to give you in some part what I have been given. The offer of my service through the blessings of my life, which are numerous, sometimes undeserved and under-appreciated, yet hopefully shared with you as I have made or taken the opportunity. YOU are the purpose of my life.

I know that God lives and loves all His children. I know it through the manifestation of the spirit in my life as it has spoken this truth to my heart and mind. I consider it one of the greatest blessings I have been given in this life! The beautiful perspective I have been offered in this truth truly fills me with happiness as I am surrounded by His great and eternal children every day that I live. I know I do not fully comprehend the expanse of Father's love, and fall short in my appreciation of it all too often, but I do see each of you with a glimpse of His perspective from time to time and I am eternally grateful for that blessing.

I know that Jesus Christ is the one and only Savior of the world and that through His atonement we can become like He is. Many things are implied by this statement when under the meticulous scrutiny of perception combined with intellect and reflection, and I am thoroughly convinced of the truth of these implications as well. I know that in my life as I have exercised the faith necessary in this truth, and acted upon that faith, that I have been changed into something better. I have gained greater self-control. I have excised corruptive and unwanted aspects of my character. The process has brought me peace, relief, and comfort... and I know the same can and will be had by any who truthfully and earnestly do the same. And it all comes by His grace and power to act in our lives as we will allow Him.

I know that the true gospel of God has been restored to this earth in its complete fulness with every necessary and vital piece in it's active order according to His design. His authority is only present in His church, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints, where the fruits of his Love for his children can be obtained by any seeking them. He glories in the choices of all who come unto Him through this one and only gate leading to true salvation and happiness living with Him eternally.

I know that I carry the weight of these statements in my life. I am bound by my word. Even this meager testimony. I hope that what I have shared here will inspire any reading it in a positive way, indeed towards Christ the only true source of happiness, as I do share this out of my love. This is a significant part of my life which is so often held in reserve unnecessarily. I do apologize for my typical lack of character in this regard. For all my fancy and frivolous talk I unfortunately neglect the truer more tender parts of my expression all too often.

Nonetheless... These are MY words. This is MY testimony. I leave it with you in the name of Him, my Lord and Savior, Jesus Christ, amen.

Sincerely,

Aaron Castillo

Merry Christmas and a grand new year to you all!

The power of a word.

Current mood: peaceful

Suicide.

Taxes.

Terrorist.

Slavery.

Bomb.

Here are a few words that have been given a bit more weight than is typical. You may have even winced a bit after reading one or two of them. A single word can be so entrenched with history or circumstance

that it can, by itself, create powerful and meaningful emotions and reactions in those receiving them. The words I chose at the beginning of this thought almost always have a negative, even somewhat grating,

feeling to the thought of them. Given the right circumstances they could even have an adverse affect on the entire feeling of a day... for multiple people at once, even. And I don't mean the actual interaction with any of the concepts portrayed by the word... just speaking or reading of the word.

Here are a few nice words.

Bunnies.

Hug.

Laughter.

Sunshine.

Window.

And I am sure you all have different reactions than I do to the same words. You might have an adverse reaction to the word 'bunnies' if you have any recollection of Watership Down. You might also have an

adverse reaction to the word 'sunshine' if your pet ant 'Juniper' was once melted under a magnifying glass by a psychotic neighbor kid from down the street... whose name happened to be Sunshine. Likely, for most of you, this is not the case.

Words can sometimes be the auditory form of what you look like to others... as well as to yourself. Words you think about yourself shape your self-image and influence the way you behave. They are also one of

the only ways for a person to gain insight as to the true nature of YOU - the obscure, inherently complex emotions and feelings meagerly channeled into form and stability available for review. YOU are not a

collection of words, however, as they are merely an aspect of your will.

Disambiguation.

Apogee.

Exoteric.

Juxtapose.

Magniloquence.

These are a few of the words I enjoy which are a bit on the far side of the typical vocabulary range. They are generally confusing without useful context or any prior exposure. Not particularly useful words, as

their uncommon nature in a manner dictates, but they do have their place. I don't speak another verbal or written language (at least not in any proficient degree) but the other manifestations of my communication do have meaning nonetheless. It is the same as any and every other person living. We all have a voice (audible or not). All of us have the power of words at our disposal. What are we doing with them? What are we doing with the responsibility we accept by our opportunities to express? Are we careful, thoughtful, and good-willing, or do we spend the strength of our amazing, irreplaceable minds expelling garbage and nonsense? It is a choice.

So... it's time to climb back down.</o:p>

         Peace

                   Love

                              Warmth

                                        Family

                                                  Life

I have been reminded of the passing of my good friend Evelyn over the last week or so. It must be because of this particular time of year since I have not been particularly aware of the actual date very much lately. I have thought of her with fond memories. She was a master of sharing the good-willing, uplifting parts of her with others… a debt which I can never repay her, but for which I am eternally grateful. If I can share but a small piece of that with any of my friends I can only hope to have reflected her example in some part.

Happy holidays to you all! Take the time to notice and I am sure you won't regret it.