Dear Mom.

I know you are not able to put physical eyes on this text anytime soon but I feel to express some thoughts for you... nonetheless. This is likely cathartic in nature but it is also intended to honor your memory in my own way. I write to communicate the inside of me and the impulse to do so as well as gift of this expression definitely finds its roots in your parentage toward me.

You have been gone a little over half a year. In this span of time much has happened in life for me, and all of the family, as we have adjusted(with varying degrees of success) to your passing. The void left where you once were is an impossible thing to fill so we reach for whatever piece of structure, whatever familiar scrap of normalcy, whatever empathetic offering in any form that helps us to recognize our innate human power to press on. Life requires it... no matter the cost.

In many ways things have improved for me. Simply an incidental step of progress unrelated to your passing, of course, but I would have been much happier to share my successes with you here as they happened. Financially I am doing better than ever. Not where I want to be, and definitely not in a place that is ready to support a potential family, but I feel like I am gaining momentum to achieve that type of security in a relatively soonish time frame.

My focus on work has definitely challenged my general social efforts but I do feel improved in my social life despite my work. I have a great circle of positive influences in my life and consider myself lucky to be where I am.

I feel as far away as ever from any meaningful relationships that could lead to the family life I do hope to one day find. I don't feel significantly lonely, however, as I have often felt over the years as I have made failing attempts to change the situation. I am confident I am a quality prospect for the right woman and only feel that patient and thoughtful consideration will be the correct method of seeking so I am no longer frustrated by my lack of result, as I once was. I am not interested in settling for that which does not fulfill or inspire.

Mom... I miss you greatly. The sting of your loss still lingers somewhat close by and from time to time it is certainly clearer than I would expect. Who knows how to fully prepare for this sort of life event? I will continue to make every attempt to become the best version of myself in my attempt to honor your legacy, however, despite every challenge incurred by your passing.

I love you. I know you are well and I one day look forward to being with you again. Until then, thanks again for being the greatest Mom I could have ever hope to have!

Love,

Your grateful son, Aaron

Work and play mixed into one quick trip.

I just got back from a trip to Washington D.C. to do a job there. I was afforded the opportunity to spend a little personal time exploring the place as well which was quite cool since I had never been to that city before. The whole place had a very unique feeling to it that I quite enjoyed. I don't generally get any personal time when I am traveling for work so I feel quite lucky for this particular opportunity. I hope I get to visit there again sometime. It is an almost magical kind of place, as weird as that may sound. Ha.

I think I really must dislike editing.

I could have gotten an edit project taken care of today but I neglected it despite the value of getting over with it. Now I'll take care of it during the middle of next week. Meh. The rest of my day was nice anyway. Got some things done. Relaxed. All kinds of Saturdayness happening.

Five rad business days in a row.

I can't expect this sort of streak to happen with any regularity but I am quite enthusiastic about getting it this time. A couple different crews between them and they were all fun, quality folks. Positive, talented, quirky, good-humored and delightfully patient... some of the time. Ha. Anyway... I look forward to my first real day off in a long time. It is definitely overdue!

It is always nice to work efficiently.

And especially nice to work so efficiently that you basically complete three days worth of work in two days. Yes, we will have some things to do tomorrow to polish up the tougher shots but I imagine we will be getting a half-day of work in max and might even be able to avoid the rush hour on our way back. Boom!

A long day of work followed by a long day of work...

Ad infinitum. And I love it! I am quite a lucky fellow. A tired, lucky fellow. A tired, lucky, bed-owning fellow... with a pillow. Good night!

Busy as a bumbling bee.

But mostly in competent action. Bumbling is just a bi-product of my oddball humor, I'd say. Now I must sleep since the next day's worth of bumbling is only hours away!