What is my life like?

Meaning, what is the substance of my life? I think it's a good life but it seems a bit out of the ordinary. Sure, I've had my struggles but I think I have largely avoided just about any dramatic tragedy for pretty much my whole life. Some of that is just luck but I am starting to wonder if I am also dodging the bullets in a somewhat subconscious way? I have had the thought that I might be avoiding serious relationships with women to avoid the pain that comes with them... but I wonder if that might also extend to the realm of regular life as well? Is it easy to stay in my current life track, complaining about my solitude from time to time, since I am largely floating through things as one who is praised on a daily basis for all the things I do well, all the people I try to serve, all the the conflict and challenge I avoid? Sure, I am always trying to improve myself by attempting to do things that stretch my skills and test me as a person, and that has some valid meaning in the perspective of a life with substance, but I think I have largely been avoiding important female relationships as well. And I think they are the things that could potentially bring my life closer to that of the more typical and still substantial life. I am missing that component of fulfillment, love, acceptance, strength, and interdependence as well as missing all the conflict, drama, pain, and betrayal, those things which truly create substantive change in one's life and character. I should try harder to overcome my fear, recognized or not, to at least engage in some sort of meaningful relationship somehow. I need to play that stupid game better. I need to play it at all.