A little consistency is nice.

Pops has been feeling decent for several days in a row now. It might seem like a somewhat trivial hope under usual circumstances but it is definitely something different right now. And I suppose it can go with saying that the little bits of consistency are highly appreciated considering recent events but the act of saying it does seem to feel important to me now anyway. Sometimes work is its own reward and I think a similar principle applies to the act of stating the obvious... the act of forming such a statement in your mind and actually making the statement seems to release a little emotional pressure. Communication is its own form of work, I suppose. There are many reasons I take any time at all to write the blog as I do. It is a blessing in its own way... even though I don't usually make much effort to really go beyond the cursory thoughts lingering in my mind at any given moment.

Dad is now home.

He was able to come home a couple days ago. He has definitely lost a step or two but seems to be doing alright. Lots of naps. A reasonable mood. I don't really get a sense of what life is for him right now. It's hard to say if he will begin to thrive again... it seems possible. I want to be positive but I really don't know what to expect. I should spend more time with him. Really.

Health is the main topic of life when things become unpredictable.

It tends to become all that you think about when somebody(or yourself) experiences adverse medical conditions due to one thing or another. Seeing mortality lingering so close to the periphery tends to magnify one's focus on every way to avoid it... really pointing the arrow forward in time. There might be a little reflection on what might have caused the current state of things but the attuned tendency to anticipate life of a different type definitely dominates the way I seem to go about it. Are we ready for it? Life is not only an equation of the living... it is the result of everything and everyone from all of time. Our story expands from the past into the future, with and without those who have gone before us. I kind of feel like I am trying to avoid potential pain just through my deliberate and mentally challenging exploration of the topic. I suppose I will make my way to bed for a rest from it all now. Maybe my morning mind will have a different take on things.

Heavy thoughts.

As my mother's birthday came and went I had much on my mind about life and the way of things these days. I had the inclination to write her a letter about life things despite her absence as a certain feeling of purpose seemed to urge me from within. I am a bit on the disorganized side of things lately, however, especially as I prepare for the big shoot next weekend and I allowed the urge to become quiet as I wandered into the existence of today. Now... even though the specific day has passed I still feel a bit of the urge to write that letter. I think just talking about it has prompted the feeling and perhaps I'll give it a shot sometime soon... just not now. I am a bit too tired to deal with those emotions and I really need to get my head on the pillow... or maybe I am just running away from it as I lack enough of the right motivation? Meh. Off to bed with me.

So many miles.

Alaska is a very cool place. And it is very far away. But I dig it anyway and enjoyed my time there. I enjoyed the work, the people, the food, and all the many challenges. I might have gained some valuable perspective, as well. I am quite lucky to have the work opportunities that I do but even more lucky to work with the great people that I do. I look forward to seeing how our shoot went and what it becomes!